In God She Trusts

Why I Love Teaching…

Posted on: November 3, 2008


SUPPORT

Finally I’ve gotten the chance to be at home after a little bit of traveling while dancing and teaching.  Being here is coo.  I miss my family for sure and love having them in my life to balance the hectic and busyness that we striving dancers would call “our lives.”  It’s pure and good here at home.. the personalities.. the familial values… the hearts… all good… in contrast to the highly corrupted world of entertainment.

On the other hand, there’s always been a constant, bitter fight for the approval of my decision to dance rather than finish school.  Yes, we’ve all heard this story before–I come from an asian family wherein education and a college degree should be the top priority of my LIFE (k.. life only up to 25).  Anyway, I’m 23.. went to UCI for 3 years… finished some school… consider myself highly capable of finishing school if I wanted to… but I choose to follow my lifelong dream and have no regrets about it.  Why?!  I have seen myself grow tremendously as an artist, a working professional, and as a person in the path that I chose.  I have no idea what lies ahead, but I do know that I have what it takes to succeed here…. otherwise God would not have given me such a huge passion that causes me to think of dance and music almost every second of my life… and how could anyone with this much love for something just close the door to it or put it on hold!?  We have to go out and get what we want... I have chosen to do that.. slowly, but I’m gettin there.

With that said, my family asks questions about my recent dancing experiences.  I think that no matter what I do or where in the world I travel, it’s not gonna be enough.  In response to my answers, I get the “you’re a kid.. you only want what you see on TV,”  or “living the fantasy life?  better wake up..,” or the “must be hard keeping a relationship, never being home..,” or “you can’t support a family without a degree.”  I’d write my feelings on all these individual questions right now, but that’d take too long.  They bring up good points.. I’m not rich… struggling artist is the right word to use.  Regardless of these points, I know that good things are happening with what I’m doing now.. and I’ll prove it so largely that explanations won’t be needed, and that they don’t have to put me down for what I’m doing anymore.  That’s how badly I get frustrated at this.  I’m DRIVEN.  I understand my family’s worry… but because of their disapproval, I find myself closing off and refusing to talk about dance, because I wonder how much they genuinely care about it.

I guess when people don’t receive the kind of support they want from others.. and they, themselves, are trying to be a good teacher to others… they’ll make sure that others don’t have to go through the same kinds of discouraging experiences they went through.  That’s why I love teaching… to be the kind of moral support I often lacked in my own growth as a dancer.  I could only hope that I do that for others.. or have done that in some way.  I just know that it SUCKS to not have support and to try to keep relationships good in the process.  It’s amazing to share in these types of experiences with dancers I’ve met across borders… dancers who speak a different language… and who have a different culture.  I’ve met hungry, inspiring, and struggling dancers in places I never thought I’d visit!  It’s a blessed experience, and it’s all because of dance.

I know it’s a little personal.. but dancing means a lot to me.  I’m fueled by my life experiences and inspired by every struggle I face.  Thanks for reading..

in God we trust
<33 apes x essence

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1 Response to "Why I Love Teaching…"

I thought that it was a real big story at first..but it was real easy to read, i dont think u even had to mention that you’re capable on finishing school..i think its clear through your way of writing:D you a badass dancer ive seen ya on youtube, keep it up!

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